For a Borderline, the enemy in their life are the people who live with them. They resent their spouses, children and parents. It is for this reason, that non-borderlines get secondary trauma for heartaches. Those who care for Borderlines are the villains in the lives of those suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder.
It is almost like the Borderlines are fed with the thought that their spouse or children or parents are the enemies. “You are horrible children” is the frequent remark of a Borderline mom to her children.
“I hate you.” is the most common phrase heard by the Borderline spouses.
“My parents do not allow me to have fun times.” is the typical response of a Borderline Teen.
The enemy of a Borderline is the one that loves them the most. Call that “ungratefulness”. It is because we give them “reality” and they do not want to see the ugly truth. We remind them often of what they have done wrong in the past.
There is a dimension of shame in a relationship with a Borderline. They know what they have done is shameful. Shame corrodes their soul like how rust corrodes metal. They do not know how to make the relationship new again.
It is for this reason that the Catholic Faith is the best antidote for someone suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder. Even though other religions have “truths” that lead to God, the Catholic Faith has the fullness of truth. The access to the fullness of the Truth can heal them.
In the Catholic Religion, we have what you call the “Holy Eucharist” also called the “Real Presence of Christ”. For non-Catholics, if you can just suspend your present religious beliefs for a minute and really believe that the round wafer is Christ, don’t you think our Lord cannot heal you?
When Catholics kneel down with both their legs in the presence of the Holy Eucharist, we are bowing down to the “Real Presence of Christ”. It is one of our happiest moment in the day when we can have this opportunity. Even if other religion will find us “too weird”, each Catholic who reverently kneel before this Holy Eucharist have witnessed a “Holy Presence”. We then lift our prayers to the “Real Presence of Christ” including our prayers for sick members of our family.
When we look for chapels with the “Real Presence of Christ” in our neighborhood and adore our Lord in those chapels, not only do our emotional burden and load lighten up. We also learn to establish a relationship with Christ – a “real relationship”.
With this “real relationship, we can start telling our Lord how our Borderline loved one has offended us. Unlike mental counselors, Jesus listens for “free”.
In fact, Jesus will teach you how to deal with your Borderline loved one.
Catholics or not, look for Perpetual Adoration Chapels in your neighborhood. This chapel is open 24/7. You can google “perpetual adoration chapel in <put city here>. Look for the Catholic parish telephone number and call them for a numerical code. Due to many break ins, the Catholic church is protecting this chapel from thieves and those that seek to desecrate the “holy host”. You can also visit the site EUCHARISTIC ADORATION REAL PRESENCE ORG. You will find the city and state. Remember to google the pertinent parish to make sure that the chapel has no “access code”.
The Perpetual Adoration chapel in your area is a very quiet place of refuge where you can just cry out to God. Talk to God like you would talk to a therapist. And, in the silence of the room, know that Jesus is listening because His Real Presence is there.
Do this for many weeks and months and you will experience a remarkable difference in your life.
For articles on Borderline Personality Disorder, you may wish to read the following:
Handling Borderline Personality Disorder Rages: 5 Secrets for Their Loved Ones
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